Life Changes

My daughter went away to college at the end of the summer.  It was the biggest change of her life.  What has happened since has surprised me, and probably surprised her too.

The girl who left our house was opinionated but insecure.  She depended on us to push her forward.  She needed us to reassure her of her own strengths.  At the same time, she could be judgmental of others without really understanding.  I was afraid that she would get to her new school, and her new home, and become even more insecure and judgmental.  I was prepared for her to find reasons to not like the people she was surrounded by.  I was expecting long phone calls about how she couldn’t do the work she was being asked to do.  She was afraid of the unknown, and I was afraid of what I thought I did know.

What has happened has been something that I never expected.  That became clear on the first night that we left her at her new apartment.  I called just before we got home, expecting her to be anxious and feeling alone.  Instead, she asked if she could call me back later since she was hanging out with her roommates.  Who was this person I was talking to?  I was suppose to tell her that things were all going to be ok, and she was letting me know that SHE was in the middle of making that true without me.  Don’t misunderstand, I wasn’t upset, I was proud.  The very best thing she could have said to me was exactly what she said!  And, it’s gotten better.

She loves her roommates.  They may be very different from her, but that’s ok.  They may do things that she doesn’t do and not do things that she does, and it’s still ok.  I hope they can be friends for a lifetime, and she probably does too.

The first days of classes were daunting.  Riding the shuttle to campus, finding her classes, buying her books, meeting the teachers and sitting in a class with complete strangers.  Again, I expected the worst.  Again, I didn’t know the strength of my daughter.  She thought her teachers were nice.  She felt secure in her own abilities.  Again, I thought “Who is this girl?”  The girl who left my house just a few days earlier was not the person I was talking to on the phone.  Where was the insecurity?  Where were the tears, and doubt, frustration and anger?   Well, remember how I’ve always said that the person you are now will not be the person you are as you grow older?  My own daughter has created that very picture.

Alix is not the same person that left my home a few weeks ago.  The new lifestyle and new people in her life have added to her character, pushed her in new directions, and opened her eyes to things she couldn’t see when her dad and I were always in the background.  She is becoming who she wants to be and not being pressured into being who we want.  We’ve had to give up the control that we thought we had, and she’s taken over without us.  And, that’s a very good thing.

Your life will be full of changes.  Like Alix, you’ll think you know what’s coming and sometimes be afraid but you won’t really understand until you get there.  You’ll meet people who will make you see life through different eyes.  You’ll find your own strength and character.  Some of it you may expect, and some will surprise you beyond what your experience now will let you.  So, don’t give up on yourself.  The things that seem so daunting now won’t even be a memory later.  What you think that you’re lacking will either become unimportant or you’ll find it’s been there all along.  Hey, it’s going to be ok, and maybe even a really great ride.

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7 Responses to “Life Changes”

  1. jimblizzard Says:

    🙂

  2. peter moran Says:

    hi miss blizzard this is your fellow student form last year, peter moran
    i hope your school year doing fine. do you still teach at mulrennan i havent been hearing your name around the school

    • pamblizzard Says:

      Hey Peter, I’m not working this year but am thinking of doing some volunteer work at Mulrennan. Otherwise, I’m looking forward to keeping up the blog, and hearing from you guys.

      How’s your school year going?

  3. peter moran Says:

    its going great. but in IPS i have a D! i want to at least get a C in the class.
    my mom will be mad if i get a D 😦 and when i think about high school colleges will be looking at these grades….. EEK!

  4. pamblizzard Says:

    You have plenty of time to bring the grade up. Just try studying in a different way. What is IPS, and who is the teacher?

  5. peter moran Says:

    IPS is a 9th grade science class and the teacher is MRS.POTTER

  6. akm Says:

    hi ms blizzard school is going fantastic my grades are either a’s or b’s no c’s d’s or f’s also in my ips science class i have a B so i cant get any lower if i do my mom will kill me but i hope i will do fine i feel much more mature than i did last year i feel more grown up and it is weird to think that im going to high school next year everytime i think about it im like theres no way but its true its also scary to think that after high school thats really when our life begins its just going by so fast i cant believe it at all.but anyway i hope your life is going well enjoying your time BYE

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